With every year that passes, answering “what do you want for Christmas?” becomes more and more difficult. And let me tell you: that’s a huge privilege.
(And an indication that I have a spending problem.)
As an entrepreneur, and a grown ass independent woman, I’m capable of—and rarely ever hold myself back from—buying myself most of the things I’d ask Santa for: Lululemon socks, new books, Summer Fridays jet lag mask… you get the picture.
This makes thinking of a gift idea for my mom to tell Grammy Elin down in Florida pretty difficult. In a perfect world, I’d ask for what I really want to receive as a gift: someone else to pay my rent, or my car insurance, or my daycare tuition.
And this got me thinking. What would my fellow entrepreneurs want to actually receive as a gift, if it were socially acceptable to ask for the the things we really wanted?
Keep reading for my best unconventional gift ideas for entrepreneurs—the tangible, the unrealistic, and the straight up wishful. 😂
Vanity metric? Maybe. Possibility to change the trajectory of your business forever? Also maybe.
Don’t lie, I know you’ve done it. Imagine if someone else were taking care of the investment though. Imagine how many courses would’ve made it past the doubt! I, for one, would have mastered at least 17 different specialties by now if my online course budget were endless.
And, speaking of, if you’re wondering which courses are definitely worth actually clicking the ‘buy’ button, here’s a short list of a few that my clients and I love:
Wouldn’t it be nice if the jolly old man in red could sprinkle some magic dust and ensure that every single inquiry you ever received were from a dream client who valued your services, respected your timeline, paid in full, loved everything you created, gave no edits, told all their friends to work with you, and wanted to be your bestie?
Sounds like the ideal Christmas present to me.
(This one was kind of cheating, though, because you don’t actually have to ask Santa—you just need a little bit of help with SEO and copywriting. And if you can handle waiting until the Christmas season is over to learn how to attract those people—I’ve got just the thing.)
Self-explanatory. Who wouldn’t want to get that check in their stocking?
While I love Dubsado dearly, and appreciate how easy the system makes seamlessly scheduling meetings & sending proposals, contracts, invoices, and questionnaires, no one wants to pay for this crap. How nice would it be if Santa could take care of all of our boring monthly fees?
But if Santa can’t help, I have a little something to spread some holiday cheer. To ease the pain of those tantrum-inducing fees, use ‘btlcopy’ for 20% discount at checkout.
Like I said, no one wants to pay for this crap. Why should I have to pay to get paid? Annoying.
Sure, there’s plenty of SEO strategy and optimization you could do to make this happen, but ultimately, that’ll take years to come to fruition. You can absolutely optimize your way to the number-one spot for lots of pages on your site… but every single page ranking #1? That’s a job only Santa could do.
(My clients Abbey or Stepf could get you pretty close, though. If SEO is on your new-year to-do list, you should reach out to one of them! They both have DIY courses and DFY services to help you improve your website’s SEO & your organic content marketing strategies.)
I’m not gonna lie, I fantasize about millions of people waking up on Tuesday mornings and the Table of Contents being the first thing they think of. And every single one of those millions of people want to read my ridiculous stories, sign up for my copywriting course, hire me to write their website, tell all their friends about me, buy everything from every affiliate link I share, and send me flowers.
Or something like that.
Every year, I get a little bit closer to my fantasy becoming reality—my email list has near tripled over the last 14 months—but I’m not quite in the millions. Sooo, Santa baby, slip a ‘subscribe’ button in everyone’s stocking this year, would ya?
Speaking of: click here to subscribe to my weekly newsletter. 😏
(If you’re looking for ideas, I’m partial to the Greyhound template. It’s downright SEXY. Also obsessed with their best-selling Lillet Blanc template right now. And, unrelated, but also their newsletter.)
For them, for their kids, either one. Someone in this damn house needs to sleep, so we can get to work. Please.
Having access to endless stock photos, videos, and media is a godsend when it comes to marketing your business. My personal favorite is Haute Stock, because they organize their photos into collections that make it easy to keep things consistent, and they’re curated for the exact purpose of being used by online business owners like us, no matter which niche you serve—there’s something for everyone!
This is definitely something Santa actually could bring you this year, and it would no doubt be the gift that keeps on giving. I signed up a few Novembers ago and have been using it consistently every week (in my newsletters, in my blogs, on my website, in my presentations, in my IG photos) for years.
There’s nothing worse than checking your email, seeing a new submission from a lead who says all the right things, making you think a dream project is on the horizon, only to end up with… crickets.
Santa, plz don’t let people play with my heart like that.
(Similar to the ideal client inquiries, this is something strategic website copywriting can fix. If this is happening to you—and getting rid of those ghosters is at the top of your wishlist—I’d love to help you write website copy that attracts the right people and repels the wrong ones. Get more details here!)
“No, I’m not a copyright lawyer, but, yeah, totally, I see why you thought that. Haha! Yep! Totally similar! Confusing for sure.”
“So, essentially, I write words that sell things. No, I don’t work on Superbowl commercials. That would be cool, though!”
“Nope, I don’t design websites, I just write them. Like, the words that go on them. Someone else does the design. Yeah, they can probably code. No, I don’t use CSS. I send them in Google Docs. Uh huh, people pay for it. It’s nice.”
This may or may not be unrelated to business, but I’ve always wanted to be able to take a picture with my eyes, and I feel like my fellow entrepreneurs would feel the same. I can’t believe it’s taken this long for someone to invest something like this.
Honestly, it’s low-key creepy. But I still want them.
I’m really putting myself on blast admitting this right now, but I know I’m not the only one, so I’m just gonna say it: you ever have those times where you’re hours away from a deadline, struggling more than you’ve ever struggled before, praying to Christ, Son, and Holy Spirit that someone would come out of the woodwork and take you out of your misery (aka take your task out of your hands)?
Imagine if you had an emergency button that you could press when you just f***king can’t, and some cute little gremlin popped out and wrote your copy for you? Or designed your logo? Or answered your emails?
And this cute little gremlin wouldn’t charge you any money, and would get it done within the hour?
Santa, or Mom, if you’re reading this, send me one. You guys can skip my birthday present. And next year’s Christmas. I need this gremlin.
(I realize this is why outsourcing exists, but my particular brand of ADHD and perfectionism would prefer a tiny creature popped out of a button to do it for me, for free. Thanks.)
Actually, screw Santa—I’ve got this one. Here you go.
This may just be me, my horrible boundaries, and my ADHD speaking, but entrepreneurs often forget to eat. But if they had gorgeous cookware, maybe they’d make it a priority… 😏
Caraway not only has the most gorgeous cookware and bakeware—that I may or may not have just spent $850 on, please God no one tell my financial advisor—but they also have gorgeous website copy. Check back on the BTL blog soon for a case study breaking down why it works so well!
(Use my link to get 10% off your first purchase!)
Speaking of things I’m in the process of writing case studies about: tickets to see the “baseball” team taking social media by storm would be the perfect experience for any creative person who loves a good show.
(I’ll explain why in an upcoming post, but or now, do yourself a favor and binge watch their TikToks. You’ll want to block off an hour on your calendar for it.)
No matter how much peace our brains may need to fuel our creativity, nothing can come between an entrepreneur and their email inbox.
I’ve tried everything. Deleting the gmail app from my phone, setting screen time limits, putting on my OOO message… in the end, the only thing that actually worked was straight up blocking gmail from Safari on my phone. I have 0 self control.
Maybe that’s what I should ask Santa for.
Again, this could just be me, but similar to not making the time to eat… us entrepreneurs oftentimes don’t make time to get dressed in a real outfit, mostly because a) we’re usually working from home and b) no one ever sees below our shoulders on Zoom.
(Even though we—ahem, I—know how much it positively impacts our outlook and productivity.)
Nuuly is a susbcription service that allows you to rent 6 items of cute ass clothing every month from stores like Anthropologie, Free People, and more. Give us a reason to get dressed plz.
I may be a psycho for living by this philosophy, but: if you’re early, you’re on time. If you’re on time, you’re late.
If I’m supposed to have a discovery call with someone at 10am, and it’s 10:02 and they’re not there, I start stressing that they’re ditching me—even though, yes, I’m fully aware that Internet problems exist, Zoom takes a minute to load, humans are humans… but still.
Santa, I’d love for every single person to sign onto my calls the second they’re supposed to start, to save me from sending the awkward “hey, so-and-so, I’m in the Zoom whenever you’re ready!” email.
Not gonna lie, I wanted to use the real F word here, but it felt a little aggressive in the headline font. Just know I’d really love a fucking break.
If you have an entrepreneur-slash-mom in your life that you want to deeply impress and greatly please, gift her a night off. She needs it more than she’s willing to admit.
Or maybe sending a new lead our way would work, too. Merry Christmas, mofos. I love you.
Creative launch copywriter slash sales-focused storyteller, obsessed with writing copy strategically crafted to help business owners connect with their ideal clients. Click here to get to know me!